Yea, Though I Drive Through the Valley of Radar

Sunday morning, 0530 hours: I’m working, heading for a toy show in my Honda Civic, with my best friend V1.

Driving on Route 38 (Roosevelt Road), empty this time of day, invites hustle; 10 or 15 over the posted 35 would be easy. Entering Oakbrook Terrace, I get the usual false signals from storefronts and I keep the needle down in the sensible range. I get a blip of Ka and slow a little more. The rest of the cars I was traveling with pull away as I get more cautious. The Ka gets stronger and stronger. I spot a squad car. The victim has his wallet out.

Next town over is Villa Park. I get a full-frontal zap with instant-on K band while the officer is doing his Dunkin Donut run. Gee, thanks! But V1 saw him coming three quarters of a mile away and I checked my speed.

Wheaton is known for very aggressive traffic enforcement. Just inside the city limits a squad car is hiding in a dealership. He’s on Ka and V1 finds him up long before he finds me. A mile later I get zapped with moving Ka, an officer looking to make his quota this month. For good measure, he blasted me again going away. I watch him in my mirror. A half mile away, he turns around and reels in a victim.

About 2 miles from the Toy Show, I get zapped again, this time by a patrol unit ahead of me clocking behind as I approach him. All of this happens in a span of eight miles from the expressway to the Toy Show.

When I get to the parking lot, I do a silent thanks to Mike for a first rate product that never lets me down. Excelsior!

William Moy
Oak Park, IL